Kimler Adventure Pages (http://randsco.com)

Future of Randsco Undecided

NO b2evolution v2.4.2 "Palms": Faced with a huge time commitment to port an existing skin or starting over with a new skin - Randsco says "NO" to a v2.4.2 blog upgrade. "We can't justify the time, especially for minimal visitor improvements," say Randsco execs. _{Randsco Newswire}

Randsco Headquarters - Only a day after calling a press conference, Randsco executives were inviting reporters back for another press conference.

"As quickly as the upgrade to b2evolution v2.4.2 - code name "Palms" - began, it ended," reported the editor-in-chief, "We've given all the employees the rest of the day to unwind, as they are very disappointed from this turn of events."

When questioned further, Randsco executives indicated dismay at the discovery that, with all the custom coding done over the years at Randsco, there is no straight forward way to port the current skin into a v2.x world.

"We reported on our dismay when we upgraded last time, a little over a year ago," said Scott Kimler, Randsco founder and chief-editor, "We were hoping that b2evolution developers would hear our cry - 'Updating b2evolution skins should be a far less painful task!'"

"Sadly, it appears they have not," said Scott, "In fact, moving customized skins from v1.x to v2.x has become a nearly impossible task."

He went on to explain that the after the existing database was copied and upgraded, and the new software downloaded, unzipped and installed, it was painfully obvious that b2evolution skins had been substantially modified.

"We quickly realized that there was no straight-forward way of porting the old skin, with all of it's proprietary tools, code and features, into the new version," Scott said.

"Sadly, we're faced with two choices," Scott explained, "either a complete re-work of our old skin, shoe-horning it into the new system - which may make upgrading more difficult in the future - or start over from scratch."

"We just can't justify the time or man-power for either task," said Scott, "All of our departments are working excess hours as it is and even if we did take the time to upgrade, the bottom line - the benefit to Randsco visitors - would be negligible."

Randsco is currently involved in the complete design or re-design of five websites. This is in addition to staff volunteering at the local Fire Department, day-care for Alexandra, ongoing maintenance operations on the 5-acre Randsco campus, refitting of the new corporate yacht "Blue Yonder" and trying to keep up with publishing at the Randsco Rag.

"We're saddened by this turn of events," concluded Scott, "and we have begun exploring other options. For now, we'll just continue on with what we have, but the future of Randsco is presently looking very uncertain."

When asked whether the other options involved switching to another content management system, Scott declined comment. He only said, "At this point, we are considering many options and trying not to close the door to any viable alternatives."

It was a somber mood, as reporters exited the campus with many of the Randsco employees. Though questioned, the employees had all been asked not to go into further detail.

This is Graham Smith, with breaking news, from the Randsco campus. Stay tuned for updates.

Dirk Smedley Sacked

Reporter Stunned - Dirk appears stunned, after receiving the boot on Tuesday. Dirk's past as a as a porn star caught up with him, thanks to a anonymous tip. _{Randsco Newswire}

Nanaimo - Long-time friends, family and Randsco staff were shocked to learn that Dirk Smedley has been fired as the senior reporter, one of several covering breaking Randsco news.

Details are unclear, but it is believed that Dirk may have been leading a double life.

Dirk was not available for comment, holding his jacket over his head and carrying a box across the parking lot of his former employer. Dirk got into his Mustang convertible and sped off, as reporters pressed him about his abrupt dismissal.

Company representatives only said, "It has come to our attention that Dirk may have been involved in dubious film-related activities. We are a conservative organization. We have ties to the church, the community and espouse family values. In keeping with our practices and standards, we have no choice but to let Dirk Smedley go."

An anonymous source had hinted that Dirk played starring roles in a variety of pornographic movies. Further investigations reveal that Dirk starred in "Birk does San Francisco", "Barrister Birk - Master Debater", and "Birk's not heavy, he's my lover".

Dirk Smedley's wife, in a phone interview, had this to say. "I knew it. That dirty rat! You can bet I'm getting a divorce!"

News of Dirk's dismissal, came on the heels of the Randsco upgrade fiasco, but is completely unrelated.

Let the Pain Begin

b2evolution v2.4.2 "Palms": Some on the b2evo dev team say, "It's about time Randsco get on board!" (Feeling a tad like the last of a dying breed, Randsco finally has prioritized an upgrade, despite the pain it will cause). _{Randsco Newswire}

Randsco Headquarters - Reporters have been banned from the Randsco campus, after Alex and Rachel departed for the mainland, on Monday.

The editor-in-chief, Scott Kimler, has barracaded himself inside the main computer laboratory, hanging a large "Do Not Enter" sign on the front entrance.

During a brief public press conference, which he gave shortly after wife Rachel and cute-as-a-button Oop departed, Scott had this to say, "We've been putting it off for some time now, but we're taking the next five days to upgrade our main blogging software."

Randsco, is currently running v1.9.3 (AKA "Rainforest") of the b2evolution blog software and is the last of the b2evolution team sites to upgrade to the the newer 2.x series. The Randsco staff will be upgrading to v2.4.2 (AKA "Palms"), which was released only yesterday.

With all of the custom coding done on the Randsco site, the migration is not expected to be easy.

"We will provide a synopsis of how it goes, but we're preparing for several days worth of work," added Scott.

At present, it is not known how many staff are on hand to handle the extensive blog upgrade, but it's been made clear that none are leaving, until the job is complete.

Reporting live from the Hutton House, this is Dirk Smedley.

Alex Graduates

Ocean Otter: Alex happily shows off her new swimming badge. She's no longer a "Floating Frog", but an "Ocean Otter"! _{Randsco Newswire}

Hutton House - Ths sun was shining, as reporters gathered on the Randsco campus this morning, snapping pictures and questioning four-and-a-half year-old Alex about her recent swimming accomplishment.

On Wednesday of last week, the Oop passed a swimming rite at the Beban Park Pool, graduating from a "Floating Frog", to an "Ocean Otter".

"How was it?" reporters asked the Oop, modeling the swimming suit that she wears to her swimming lessons, about her exam.

"Good," replied the modest Oop, holding up her badge, "See, I'm an 'Ocean Otter' now!"

Drinks were served on the sun-filled porch, after the meet-and-greet photo session was over.

Andrew, Alex's coach, wasn't in attendance, though he did write in her report card, saying, "Great Job, Alexandra! I'm glad to have you in the class."

Those readers following Alex's progress through the 6-step "Learn to Swim" program through the City of Nanaimo, will note that Ocean Otters have to pass these rigorous qualifications, in order to continue onto the next class:

Ocean Otter Badge: Alex's new badge. The next class is called "Swimming Salmon" & she's eager to begin. _{Randsco Newswire}

• Bob continuously 4 times
• Float (unassisted) for 5 seconds on their back
• Glide frontwards (unassisted) for 3 seconds
• Glide backwards (unassisted) for 3 seconds
• Roll (front to back and back to front)
• Glide frontwards and kick 3 meters within 5 seconds
• Glide backwards and kick 1 meter within 3 seconds
• Jump into the BIG pool (assisted)
• Handle an introduction to deep water

Alex had a new instructor on her last day of her "Ocean Otter" swimming lesson and he was really great with the kids.

When all of the kids were grasping the edge of the pool, practicing their kicking, he asked them to increase the intensity of their kicking by making a game of it.

"See if you guys can make enough waves to push be to the other edge of the pool!"

As the kids all strained to kick their hardest, he feigned fighting a battle against huge waves and failing, was pushed backwards and pinned against the opposite side of the pool. The kids all howled with laughter and kicked even harder, as he struggled to "break free" of the surging waves!

Some people are just great with kids, eh?

The next stop for Alex, on her way to the Canadian or U.S. Olympic swimming team, will be "Swimming Salmon"! (no pressure)

Dock Move

Rope: Richard with wrist-thick tug rope, found in the Barkley Sound, while towing the dock. _{Photo courtesy of Taylor Images}

Taylor's Landing (AKA Kimler's Cove) - Roving Randsco reporter, Candace Taylor, filed a report on Saturday's dock tow, across the Barkley Sound, that night from the cabin. The cell phone connection was "iffy", but the gist of their day's adventure was relayed.

Crabs: Candace shows off a couple of large dungeness crab that were caught in the Ucluelet harbor. "They were absolutely huge," Candace said. (I think she was right!) _{Photo courtesy of Taylor Images}

After catching a couple of honking dungeness crabs in the Ucluelet harbor, and tying off the new 10-foot by 30-foot dock (it was first reported to be 25 feet long, but apparently, it's now swelled to it's true size of 30 feet) the towing began. After leaving the harbor, the seas became very rough and the open water passage to the broken group islands went at a snails pace and the occupants of the tow boat were tossed and rolled, to the point of sea-sickness.

It's unclear exactly who blew grits, but it's known at this time that both dogs lost their lunch. It's assumed that the other sea dogs, the more experienced pilot, Richard and his gimpy first mate, Candace (she's blown out a knee and is awaiting reconstructive surgery) ... fared only slightly better.

Underway: Picture of the dock, behind the boat, after getting out of the rough waters and things had settled down a tad. "Both dogs got sick and I told Richard to put away the bag of Doritos chips, cause I felt green around the gills too!" said Candace, of their rough passage, "The tow rope broke several times and we almost cut the dock loose." _{Photo courtesy of Taylor Images}

The tow rope broke a couple of times, in the rough water and much time was spent retrieving and reconnecting to the free-floating dock.

"At one point," Candace said, "I looked over at Richard and asked him, 'Are you thinking we should just cut this dock loose and forget about it?'"

"The waves were coming off our starboard side, the whole time we were making our open water passage," said Candace, "this cause the boat to roll violently, side-to-side and everyone was green."

The gruesome twosome prevailed and they eventually reached the relatively protected waters of the Broken Group.

New Wharf: A picture of the new wharf, taken the next day. Richard cut the tie rail so people don't trip over it, walking onto it from the cabin wharf. Three beams, given in lieu of a "Ucluelet-born-and-raised" discount, sit on the far side of the new dock. Pretty spiffy guys! _{Photo courtesy of Taylor Images}

"We do have some good news," said Richard, "On our way out, we found about 200 feet of tug boat rope. It's thicker than your wrist and must be worth about $1000, at least."

When asked why he didn't use that rope, after the other kept breaking, he said, "The tug rope is so thick, I've got nothing to tie it to on the boat!"

By dusk, the dock was at the cabin and Richard worked into the dark, disconnecting the old dock and moving it to it's new resting place, then positioning the new dock into place.

It was a rough ride, a long day and everyone was dog tired ... so to speak. Yay! The new dock is in place and looks great!

Meanwhile ...

Hutton House - Saturday's nice weather was followed by another day of sunshine. The weatherman called for rain by noon, but it never happened.

Thinking it might rain in the afternoon, Scott took advantage of the morning sunshine and busied himself by applying a semi-transparent stain to the chicken coop. Because it had been built in a hurry, right before winter, he'd never had a chance to protect it with paint or stain.

Sitting in the sunshine, eating a peanut butter and honey sandwich, the Oop supervised, while Scott layered on almost a full gallon of stain.

The hens were in a kaffuffle all morning, because they didn't have access to the coop, while their angled walkway was being stained. Then they were upset because the door was shut. Then it was that the nesting boxes were open. Scott eventually let them out of their run and they had free range of the yard.

"Where did they go?" asked Scott, retorically, "Straight to the flower garden, where they proceeded to tear into everything."

As soon as the coop was painted, it was back into the run, for the chickens.

"Man, they really tear things up," said Scott, "Their run looks like a war zone and I'm sure Rachel would be unhappy if her flower gardens looked the same."

Hover over the photograph to see how much wood Scott could chuck, when he made like a woodchuck and chucked wood.

After painting the chicken coop, Scott headed down to the pasture, where he finished sawing up the slash. After finishing that, he let Alex "drive" the truck down and then the two of them loaded up the firewood and hauled it up the hill, dumping it into the old dog run, where it's now in a pile and still needs to be stacked.

It took two full pickup truck loads, to move all the firewood.

One of the two piles of wood have now been cleared. The remaining pile has a lot of bigger logs in it and will require a chainsaw, to get it cut into woodbox-sized pieces.

"Gradually, the clearing is getting cleared," reported Scott.

After moving the wood, Scott polished off the day by giving the clearing it's first haircut of the season. The mow job will help keep down the thistles, nettles and other weeds (primarily).

Busy spring days!